Massachusetts G.L. c. 209A protects people in domestic relationships. Before a judge ever reaches the question of abuse, the plaintiff must show that the parties are "family or household members." If that threshold isn't met, a 209A order is not available — period.
The qualifying relationships
Under § 1, "family or household members" are people who:
- are or were married to one another;
- are or were residing together in the same household;
- are or were related by blood or marriage;
- have a child in common, regardless of whether they ever married or lived together; or
- are or were in a substantive dating or engagement relationship.
What "substantive dating relationship" means
Casual or one-time contact is not enough. Courts look at factors such as the length of the relationship, the type of relationship, the frequency of interaction, and (if it ended) how long ago. The point is to capture real romantic relationships, not a single date or a brief acquaintance.
Why this element is a complete defense when it's missing
The relationship requirement is a threshold legal element. A defendant who can show the parties are not, and never were, family or household members has a complete defense — the court should not issue a 209A order at all, regardless of what else happened. This is why pinning down the relationship precisely matters for both sides.
If there's no qualifying relationship
Plenty of genuinely frightening situations involve people with no domestic tie — a harassing neighbor, a hostile coworker, an obsessive acquaintance, a stranger. Those situations are real, but they belong under a different statute: G.L. c. 258E, the harassment prevention order. The legal standard there is different (generally three or more willful, malicious acts, or one qualifying serious act such as stalking or assault). If that describes your situation, our sister site harassmentorder.com is built specifically to prepare 258E cases.
How Restraining Orders helps
Allie's intake interview establishes the relationship element early and precisely, because everything else depends on it. If your facts point to 258E instead of 209A, we'll tell you plainly and point you to the right resource rather than letting you file under the wrong statute.